July 3, 2008 at 4:35 am (Poetry, family and life, life in our world of insanity, marriage, the life of a lupus survivor)
Tags: Family, grace, kids, Life, love, marriage, mom, wonder
There are days when I wonder
Is this all there is?
Is the world turning but I am just standing still?
There are days when I wonder
Am I a good mom? Grandma? Step mom?
Have I trained up my children in the way that they should go?
Will they remember?
Am I enough of a woman for my husband.
There are days when I wonder
Is my mom looking down
Is she proud of where I’m going?
Was she proud of where I’ve been?
But then there are days that I know
I have loved my kids with all my heart.
I have tried my hardest to show them
GRACE.
God’s grace.
I know…
That I am moving forward
as best as I can, one foot in front of the other
Lupus be damned.
I know…
I love my husband unconditionally.
We forgive, although sometimes hard to forget
We forge onward into the building of a life.
We love completely, whole heartedly.
Our passion isn’t held back.
And I know….
My mom is looking down
She is loving me from heaven
She is proud of me, proud of my children
She knows she taught me well
the meaning of
Amazing grace.
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May 8, 2008 at 4:22 am (BLENDED FAMILY, Poetry, family and life, life in our world of insanity, marriage, the life of a lupus survivor)
Tags: BLENDED FAMILY, brothers, children, desires, dreams, Family, gifts, hopes, joy, kids, love, Mother's day, relationhsip, sisters, wishes
“What do you want for Mother’s day this year?”, they asked. They ask it every year. And every year I say the same thing. You don’t need to get me anything. Cuz they really don’t. I’d love it if they would clean thier rooms, or clean out the dishwasher, or something like that without being asked. That would be lovely! But, seriously, a gift is not needed!
What I really wish for, hope for, pray for every day is that my kids grow up to be strong adults with good heads on their shoulders. I pray that they make wise choices as they are growing up and choose not to get involved in “stupid stuff” that will lead them down avenues that could destroy them, or harm them in anyway. And, if they do make mistakes, which I know they all will, I pray they learn from them and don’t repeat them.
For the boys in this family I pray they learn to be great to women, kind, loyal, loving and true. That they respect themselves enough to respect the women in their lives. I hope they make long lasting friendships that they can carry with them through life, bonds that are strong and reach across the years. I hope they have the courage to chase after their hopes and desires and live their lives to the fullest. I pray that they continue to build their relationships with each other and lean on each other…that they watch out for one another…remember they are brothers.
For my girls I pray that they are strong, fighters, that they are also gentle and caring. I hope they have open hearts, that they can learn to trust and feel free to love and be loved. I pray that God brings some one into their lives that will love them without condition, who will be supportive and a partner and friend to them. It is my wish that they will feel free to dream and reach for those dreams and desires, that they will fly through life with joy and grace. And that they will always hold tight to each other as sisters.
Each and every day, if all those things could happen for my children, this blended family of mine, all of my mother’s day wishes would be fulfilled.
Happy Mother’s day to all you mom’s out there. May all your mother’s hearts dreams come true for you!
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April 24, 2008 at 2:57 pm (Poetry, family and life, life in our world of insanity, marriage)
Tags: children, Family, kids, Life, love, marriage, Poetry, relationship
I know every mom out there wonders when they will have a chance to go to the bathroom uninterrupted, or eat without having to get up from the table to get something for someone, or just be able to get in bed without having to get up several times to make sure a kid is in bed or to get someone water, make sure the doors are locked or whatever. To those moms’ out there…this one’s for you. ( oh and you single dad’s too!!!!)
Where
When they skin their knees,
When a cold wears them down,
Where do they go?
When a bully is mean
And brings them to tears
Where do they go?
They come to me.
When life treats them poorly
When their hearts break
When they find their first love
When their first love is gone
Where do they go?
They come to me
When they’ve had a hard day
When a case falls apart
When work is unbearable
When they need to sound off
Where do they go
They come to me
When I’ve had a bad day
When I don’t feel like smiling
When things overwhelm me
When I wish I could scream
Where do I go?
I stuff it..
Inside of me.
Inside of me
L.G. 2006
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April 4, 2008 at 3:18 pm (Poetry, family and life, life in our world of insanity, marriage, the life of a lupus survivor)
Tags: Family, health, kids, Lupus, marriage, Poetry, relationships, survival
Needles, pills, fatigue
life of endless pain.
going through the motions
wanting to go insane
Never ending worry
sickness in and out
the illness is judge and jury
there is no way out.
I’ll fight until the end
until the pain subsides
I’ll never let it win
I’ll make it through the tides.
Deep breaths and hopes and dreams
some that seem out of reach
the tears never end it seems
it sucks my strength like a leech.
But I will keep fighting the battle
the war is mine to win
for my kids, my husband, myself
for the others yet to begin.
The slow and silent killer
it lays in wait to destroy
But I won’t let it kill me
my life won’t be it’s toy!
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