This is an incredibly hard time in my life. So many things are happening and I feel like I am spinning out of control. I have people pulling me in every direction you can imagine. It is really difficult when there is a kid in the family who has caused stress, grief, and hurt and then that child is thrust back upon the rest of the family…it sort of all falls apart. And, mom, that would be me, is pushed into the middle.
Step families are hard as it is. Trying to keep a semblance of normalcy is difficult at best. But add into that a wayward child and things go all hay wire. And, everyone has an opinion on how things should or shouldn’t be handled. I’m just trying to hold it all together and stay healthy at the same time. Not an easy task.
Marriage is hard. Marriage with kids is really hard. No one truly sees how a marriage is except the people in that marriage, yet everyone has an opinion on that as well. I’m not a quitter. I don’t give up on people easily. And, I love with all my heart. I just really wish that everyone could see that I am doing the best I can. I have put everyone else first always. Now it is time for me to listen to my heart, and try to hold it together…..because I believe that is the way it should be! Everyone has their opinions, they try to tell me what to do or what is “best for me”. But really, only I can know what I need to do. I have lived a lot of life in my 46 years. I’m not stupid. I love my kids, and I love my husband. It is really a shame that there are some people who think I have to choose and that there is no way to work things out. It takes time to mend things…especially under the circumstances we are under. I am honestly doing the best that I can.