Today is my husband’s Birthday! In celebration of this great day we went, this past holiday weekend, to visit his family in Farmington New Mexico. He hadn’t seen a lot of his cousins in many years, and hadn’t been back to Farmington in I don’t know how long. We had an amazing time! His cousin John and his wife, who happens to have the amazing name of Lori!, opened their house to us and were amazingly wonderful! They took us to Silverton Co for the day…beautiful place! And the weather…it was a lupus fighter’s dream come true! It was perfect the entire weekend. We had such fun, had time to reconnect with each other after this totally stressful and crazy time in our life, talked, laughed and just had fun for a few days without worrying about anyone but us! Sounds selfish kind of, but at the same time things have been so hard, so tense and out of control with his son, and with life that we needed this time to be together! I’m not saying that we solved all the problems that are going on right now. That is a work in progress that has no easy answers…well there is one easy answer…send his son to a detention center….but even that isn’t an easy answer. I miss my kids, I miss how life was before my step son got so messed up, and I miss the more calm atmosphere that our house used to have. How to get any of that back after all the hurt and emotional turmoil that has gone on is yet to be seen.
I found this song on the Sugarland CD thats lyrics really hit me. When I heard it for the first time it was as if Jesus were standing there in front of me speaking them directly to me. I thought I would share them with you in hopes that maybe they will speak to you on some level as well!
WHEN THE WEIGHT OF THE WORLD BEARS DOWN SO STRONG, YOU LEAVE FOOT PRINTS IN THE STREET
AND THERE’S TOO MANY MILES TO FACE WITHOUT A FEW MORE HOURS SLEEP.
THE STORM CLOUDS OVERHEAD WON’T SHED ANY RAIN TO QUENCH YOUR THIRST
I WANNA BE THE ONE YOU REACH FOR FIRST!
WHEN YOU’RE FAITH IS STRETCHED SO THIN THAT YOU CAN SEE STRAIGHT THROUGH YOUR SOUL
AND YOU CAN’T FIND A NICKLE TO BUY A SMILE CAUSE YOUR POCKETS ALL GOT HOLES
BEFORE THE DAY CAN GET MUCH WORSE, I WANNA BE THE ONE YOU REACH FOR FIRST!
FALL INTO ME, MY ARMS ARE OPEN WIDE! AND YOU DON’T HAVE TO SAY A WORD CAUSE I ALREADY SEE
THAT IT’S HARD AND YOU’RE SCARED AND YOU’RE TIRED AND IT HURTS
AND I WANNA BE THE ONE YOU REACH FOR FIRST!
I need to remember to make Jesus the one I reach for first. When I feel like I can’t take anymore, like I am going to fall apart, when my heart is breaking beyond repair, He needs to be the one I reach for first!