It would seem that in the whole vast realm that is my blog (Ha ha) “lupus can be predictable” seems to be the most read post. I guess that’s a good thing because it means that more people are trying to get a handle on this whole lupus disease. It’s a little perplexing to me that more people don’t know about lupus and the affects that it has on a family, on a person, on life in general. Cancer is such a focus…and heart disease…high blood pressure… diabetes. But lupus?? Hmm…but the reality is that all those former mentioned illnesses are often associated with lupus. A lupus warrior ( I call them warriors because every day they go about their lives looking normal, acting normal, not letting on they are seriously hurting) can struggle everyday with cancer ( I have had squamous cell on my shoulder) heart disease, high blood pressure ( I am on three blood pressure meds and mine still averages 151/101) not to mention lung infections, arthritus, shingles, irritable bowel syndrome, blood clotting disorders, migraines, and a host of other ailments that just happen to accompany lupus.
A lupus warrior gets used to reading their own bodies to feel when a flare is coming on. Oftentimes we are very good at acting, we can pretend that everything is okay when it really isn’t. But we ourselves KNOW when something isn’t right. And, my family is getting pretty good at spotting when things are not quite right with me. But, even then I try my hardest to throw them off the scent and pretend like things are good.
For instance, I have been battling a migraine for about 2 days now. But I still ran my kids around from here to there, I am going to lunch with dad today, I am trying my hardest to clean this messy house of mine, and keep moving. Because in reality, there is only so long that someone can stay in bed, laying around, before they feel totally worthless and the depression that exists in the background of your mind everyday, moves to the forefront and destroys your day, week, month whatever. So, I plug on. But, tomorrow, when I have exhausted myself with trying to be a “good mom, good daughter, good wife” I will be in bed hardly able to move wishing I had taken better care of myself. Hence, the predictable part of lupus.
So, if you know someone with lupus or you yourself have it, know that you are not alone in your struggle, and fight. Know that there are many many of us out here who are dealing this on a daily basis yet feeling hopelessly alone. And don’t forget to at least some of the time take care of you!!!!!! And, keep fighting!