What to think…what to feel…

Processing life right now has become somewhat difficult.  I’m not really sure how I am supposed to feel.  It hasn’t truly hit me that dad is gone yet.  I have purposely avoided going over to his house since the funeral week because I am afraid it will be too overwhelming for me.  But, at the same time I need to go there to get some things out of there before the house is sold.  I can feel my body reacting to my lack of reaction.  I am sore and stiff and not feeling well.  In fact this morning I woke up wondering if I am getting the flu…although I did have a flu shot!  So, where do I go from here?

If i could just curl up and sleep for a few weeks I keep thinking that I will wake up and feel better.  But, I’m sure that’s not true!  I’m trying really hard to get into the christmas/thanksgiving spirit but that is coming hard to me as well.  I can’t even believe that thanksgiving is next week already.  I keep thinking I have at least a month to prepare for all of this. 

Well, I guess I just keep putting one foot in front of the other…keep moving and forging ahead.  As my grandpa used to say…”time marches on!”

2 thoughts on “What to think…what to feel…

    • lwayswright says:

      Thanks for your comment. I will probably have my kids go with me to dad’s to get the stuff. I do need to go there at least one last time before it sells. I have some goodbyes to say I think!

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