I’m trying to live life! That’s quite a statement isn’t it? I think when you have to say you’re ” trying” to live life, you are actually struggling to find and live the life you deserve. Jesus said I come to give you Abundant life. Right now I’m thinking my life, while it has it’s blessings, I can’t say it’s abundant. I want to be happy and joyful. I want to be able to say, when it’s all over, that I lived well. But I find that I am in that phase between hopefulness and hopelessness. I guess everyone going through a breakup or divorce has those days or moments of pain, times when they try to reenact it all to figure out how it all went so wrong. Then I wake up some days feeling like the sun has come out and it isn’t so bad. It’s like a slow motion black and white movie, I keep waiting for that magical ending, where the hero comes and sweeps me off my feet and protects me from the bad guy. But that ending doesnt happen so I keep waiting.
I am doing okay with my health. I still battle horrible back aches, by the end of the day I have had enough. But I’m trying to keep busy. I am making great friends, moving forward and not backwards in the things I want to do. I am weighing my options, as far as where to live and all of that. I know in the end I will be stronger physically and emotionally. But it seems like a long road.
So for now I am trying to be in the moment and on those good days I live life. And on the bad days ..something like it. It’s the best anyone can do!